I have been holding this post in my drafts folder for over three months. Part of the reason has been a very active life which has promoted blog post procrastination. However, the primary reason is my aversion to make this post public. Why? Fear? Yes. I am afraid of offending those I love, or worse, alienating myself from them because it is in relationship that we grow in understanding, and love.
The title of this blog uses the name of one of Hershey’s many delightful candies. I used it for two reasons. First, I started this post right before Halloween and candy was on my mind. However, my primary reason, and why I retained the title, is because it expresses the idea of something not clearly definable.
There are various reasons why something might allude any attempts at an unequivocal definition. It could be the varied contexts, or the varied uses given the time period, to name two. This is not to say we can’t pin down the definition of a term.
In what follows, like a jeweler using a magnifying glass to examine a diamond, I endeavor to look closely at the multi-faceted beauty often cloaked by the popular understanding of the term ‘church.’
Before I tackle that term, allow me some space to tell my personal, lifelong experience in relationship to what many would call, ‘church.’
My story begins in the midst of many prior generations of not merely church-goers, but pastors and missionaries. Clergy in other words. As a mere babe in my mother’s arms, I went to church in South Africa. We attended a Baptist church pastored by one of my uncles (my grandfather pastored a Pentecostal church in a neighboring city).
I entered Sunday School at a young age. We sang hymns, memorized Bible passages, and heard Bible stories often told using flannelgraphs (Google it 🙂 ). When Sunday School ended, I joined my family in the main auditorium for corporate singing, announcements, featured vocalists singing ‘specials,’ the taking up of tithes and offerings, and a sermon from the pastor. When that meeting ended, we would exit the auditorium shaking the hand of the pastor as we left.
I enjoyed Sunday School. It was fun to participate in activities with friends without grades being on the line. However, as a young chap my endurance for sitting still and listening to others sing or speak faded shortly after leaving Sunday School. So, for several years I would make the gradual slide from being vertical in the pew to a horizontal position with my head in my mother’s lap (thinking back, I find this a very understanding and kind response by my mother – those who know her know this about her).
When we arrived in the U.S.A. in the late 70s, we attended a Baptist church. After a few months in a local public school my parents agreed to enroll me in the church’s private school (about 800 students in grades 1-12). I completed my senior year there. A year or so later, I started visiting my sister and brother-in-law in a rural community in north Georgia almost every weekend. They attended an Assembly of God church there, and I would accompany them on those Sundays when I stayed with them.
My wife’s grandparents founded that Assembly of God church. It was at this church that I met my then wife-to-be. We were married in that church. As an aspiring pastor I got involved in various ministries in that church. A few years later I was appointed to the position of Youth Pastor.
In order to move the story along so I can tackle the term, I will summarize the intervening years. We (my wife, then later our children) were always very involved in the churches we attended. After leaving the AoG church, we attended churches that would be classified as independent churches (those with no denominational affiliation) with a charismatic orientation. My role in each ranged from serving as an elder, pastor, and small group leader. My wife often participated in the choir, worship teams, or led women’s ministry. In short, we were a part of the leadership team in every church we attended.
Then in the beginning of 2012 I stopped going to a ‘church.’ I have yet to return. This was not an easy decision for me. I struggled for years with not only the theological arguments, but the sociological and psychological aspects too. You might wonder, as did I initially, is it possible to not go to a ‘church’ and be a Christian? I ask, is ‘church’ defined by a building you enter with others who believe the same, or an acceptable approximation to, tenets of the faith as you? Notice the absence of the indefinite article ‘a’ in the last question – church vs. a church.
Let us fasten our seatbelts, put on our thinking caps, as we delve into this subject in more depth in the second part of this post coming soon (not another three months this time 🙂 ).